Which Real Madrid player would you most like to slap?

[La Furia]

In honour of Villa's heroic actions, I now will ask you: If you could slap a member of that evil team, who would it be? I'm not including Mourinho because it would be too easy.

Choices included in the poll:
Sergio "The Gypsy" Ramos
"Psychopath" Pepe
Ricardo "The Kingfish" Carvalho
Sami "Kung-Fu" Khedira
Cristiano "CRgay" Ronaldo
Mesut "Bug-eyed" Özil
"The Cunt" Marcelo
Xabi "Javi" Alonso
Fábio "Cuntrao" Coentrão
Angel "Flop" di Maria
Iker "Spain's Second Goalkeeper" Casillas
Karim "French Jailbait Connoisseur" Benzema
Gonzalo "Gonzalo" Higuaín
Álvaro "This guy still plays for Real Madrid?" Arbeloa
"Jesus saved me, but not my career" Kaká


Sahin and Altintop are probably assholes too, but they haven't played a game yet so they are off the hook for now. I don't know enough about Raphaël "Frenchie" Varane either.

Fernando "Lady" Gago, Royston "OG" Drenthe, Lassana "Lass" Diarra" and Raúl "Own Goal" Albiol are barely still Madrid players, and the token youth products are only there for show anyway.

 

[Chainsaw]

All of em except Higuain, Kaka, Gago and maybe Benzema.

Add 'all of em' to the poll.

 

[Barcafan 2304]

Can you only chose one? So difficult. Probably Pepe at a push

 

[La Furia]

All of em except Higuain, Kaka, Gago and maybe Benzema.

Add 'all of em' to the poll.

I figured that one would be too obvious, I'd select that myself, this is if you have to choose.

 

[House of Flies]

Oh yah

 

[Sergio]

None of them, they are all professional athletes, am pretty sure they could hand me my ass back if I slapped them.

Except Cristiano, he would probably fall over and roll around purely on instinct.

 

[estranged]

First of all, great thread.

Secondly, this has to be one of the toughest questions I have ever been asked.

It would have to be one of: Sergio "The Gypsy" Ramos, "Psychopath" Pepe, "The Cunt" Marcelo and Angel "Flop" di Maria.

Ultimately "The Cunt" Marcelo gets my vote.

 

[Barcafan 2304]

None of them, they are all professional athletes, am pretty sure they could hand me my ass back if I slapped them.

Except Cristiano, he would probably fall over and roll around purely on instinct.

Well, true. It should be entitled, a RM player you would slap if it was possible that you could get away with it without getting your own arse kicked.

 

[estranged]

Beast voted for kaka? Why would you want to slap jesus' son?

 

[La Furia]

First of all, great thread.

Secondly, this has to be one of the toughest questions I have ever been asked.

It would have to be one of: Sergio "The Gypsy" Ramos, "Psychopath" Pepe, "The Cunt" Marcelo and Angel "Flop" di Maria.

Ultimately "The Cunt" Marcelo gets my vote.

It was between those ones for me, but it's easier for me to slap a guy who looks like an alien than a horse or a you-know what, it would feel like animal cruelty, and "Flop" gets a free pass from me for being Argentine even if watching him play can be very painful.

 

[Beast]

The same i would slap any of my children when they are into drugs

 

[Chainsaw]

I figured that one would be too obvious, I'd select that myself, this is if you have to choose.

I wanted to push Marcelo but thought it's unfair to many others who deserves the same treat.

 

[Agri]

Sergio "The Gypsy" Ramos

What's a Gypsy? You must excuse my ignorance...

 

[Barcaman]

Pepe. Amusing too see him bully lightweight category players of Barca. He must feel so tough.
Would love to have 5 minutes with him to re-arrange his face.

 

[La Furia]

What's a Gypsy? You must excuse my ignorance...

It's a less proper word for the Romani nomadic people who live all across Europe, though it's often used to describe any group of nomadic vagabonds.

Andalucia is filled with gypsies..like Sergio Ramos.